Advice. (noun) guidance or recommendations offered with regard to prudent action. Synonyms include: aid, encouragement, instruction, input, judgment, lesson, suggestions, help…
I realised a very long time ago that I am often much better at offering sound advice than following it.
Any given day you’ll hear me spout off about the importance of kindness, patience, resilience and integrity. I’ll tell anyone who will listen how important it is to be non-judgmental. HA! I ought to be ashamed (and to be honest I often am) of how judgmental I actually can be! I have been known to write people off as douchebags just based on the industry they work in or the clothes they wear. I occasionally have to reconsider this snap judgment when I actually get to know people a bit better.
My beloved Grumpy husband pointed out as I read this aloud to him, that experience has taught us both that there are red light indicators on people’s almost certain douchebaggery. Sometimes it turns out they ARE quite terrible. Other times, it turns out that they are amazing and I have so much to learn from them. We avoid certain social and business circles completely because the chances are, we will be as appalled or disinterested in the people that frequent them as they would be in us and our chosen friends and colleagues. So maybe being a little teeny tiny bit judgemental saves us all a bit of time? Now THAT is a slippery slope to start traveling down, so do not take that as any sort of sage advice please. I would suggest that you reserve opinion and judgment on anyone/everyone until you actually know them. Seriously. Once you do know someone, if you can’t say something nice, try not to say anything at all. This, of course, is another piece of advice that I suck at following almost daily.
So yes. I’ll pontificate on the importance of gratitude and generosity, and then I’ll be horrendously hypocritical and say something like: “generosity is wonderful, but remember to never give more than you can afford, financially, emotionally or otherwise” which is ridiculous because we run ourselves regularly ragged giving far too much time, energy and resources to too many people and projects.
Now that I think of it, I’ll even offer advice on things I know very little about like nutrition, exercise or diet. Pfft. Have you seen me lately? Not exactly the poster girl for peak physical or mental condition.
No one needs to tell me how full of hot air I can be, because I actually acknowledge, perhaps even embrace this truth about myself (and every other human I’ve known) already. But you know what? I am going to continue sharing and receiving advice. I am going to continue asking people what they think about things.
So in a grand and ironic gesture, I am going to ply you all with MORE advice.
Don’t expect yourself to be perfect. You aren’t. I can promise you that much.
Don’t expect perfection from anyone else. They aren’t. But please try and believe that they are doing what they can to be a better person, and if you can’t abide by something about them or their actions, you can always walk away, and I suggest that you do if you find them upsetting.
As you read this, you wil know what your moral compass and inner truth is. Just follow that. Our lives unfold as they should, based on the choices we make and the advice we do and do not act upon.
Try and be the best version of yourself, and if and when you have failed in this measure, just keep on trying I guess.
Have a great rest of the week.
Thank you for reading and OH MY GOODNESS it feels good to be writing!
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